Noon Winks Café.

Red leather chairs, orang’ish floors and walls with a hint of red and purple all muted.  A little energy from Ow-la-la espresso at a coffee shop on Plymouth out by the Humane Society. Sadly I dressed up so I couldn’t go walk dogs. What was I thinking? Oh and my hair, who cares it is not that messed up. I will not get out here any time soon (dressed up) so I will ask if they have any job… what am I thinking… deep breath. I need not be intimidated by the seriousness of a job there. I need to get a serious job.

Do I really want to go ask for a job at the Humane Society? I am sure I would need up cleaning… not that this matters. I would have to watch countless dogs and cats that I love come and go. I would have to stand by the killing. No, this is not a job for the mentally ill. Yet I need a job… I need a job.

It would be a job of hardship and joy unlike many boring jobs out there. I will go now. Well, there is no cup holder in my car… so I will go after my drink is done.

You see it is about time I start to expand my search for jobs, and I had thought about the Humane Society from the beginning and will continue to unless I walk in there today and ask.

What do you think the cost of gas is between my apartment and the Humane Society? I am not thinking of this because of a job alone, but because I need to exercise and why not walk dogs while doing it. Lets see. I have to face this question. Lets ‘mapquest’ the two places and see the distance between. Five miles driving. Ahhh now I need the gas mileage and I cannot find it!

I give up for now… I know I’ve seen charts with average gas mileage for different cars and different years many times. Oh well. Sigh.

At least I know now that I take the best route to the Humane Society. Chug, Chug, Chug. I cannot have alcohol, but I can have caffeine. Thank God for caffeine. There are moments in my life when I stop to think… only God could have made this. Coffee is one of those things.

***

My head is in a weird state right now. Perhaps it was from the heat in the car. I opened the windows after a while, but was so focused on the road that I forgot it at first. I am trying to draw a map in my head. Really I spent the last ‘who knows how many' minutes’ staring at Google maps. I matched the map in front of me with the map in my head.

Now the only thing to see is if it will take me somewhere… what… watch I will do more map studying. You know for that day when we all have hybrid (or whatever cars) and can therefore travel cheaply like people did in the past. I need to know my way around! Ahhh! Detroit (and the area around it) is just too much. So many roads! So confusing. Sigh.

More Matcha Please

Tea. Matcha. That is a green tea that I made a big deal about getting. Somehow tea is one of those things that both calms me and wakes up my mind. Just a little and I have gone from, “Oh, I want to go back to bed.” to “I want to write about tea!” If I were a scientist studying moods and possible new ways to fight Bipolar disorder I would have no end of things to look into. It is because I have a sensitive brain that can pick up on the slightest change. I think I am going to make more tea. I will be back soon.

All I need to do now is wait for the tea to cool a little. This makes two days now. Two days of normal sleeping hours! Just 8 hours of sleep, and sure I was a little sleepy when I got up, but writing and tea seem to have given me more energy then I have had in a long time… for those of you who are not filled in (did not read my older posts) at one point I was sleeping up to 16 hours a day because of medication. Sometimes I lose a whole day to sleep, but I can force myself to get up in order to live life a little.

I had a few readers once, but then I posted some stuff I wrote for a humor class (we were talking about how the gross is funny and etc) and I lost a link to my site and at least one person even pulled out of my polls. I have learned my lesson and will keep disgusting humor stuff out of my blog.

I forget why a blog is called a blog. I know it is short for online personal journal, but where did the b come from…?

Hmmm. I had a sudden vision of my brother W. at Borders talking about this. We were in the coffee shop. I like coffee shops. They are of comforting. I almost made up a special espresso drink today with the machine my sister S. left when she moved out of down, but I have forgotten the temp. of the milk. We had everything needed for a homemade vanilla cappuccino, for maybe a caramel latte.

Yummy. Tea is so good. After I run out of this Matcha I cannot afford anymore. I only have one or two cups worth. Goodbye Matcha.

Why is it that Word does not accept the word ‘blog’ as a correct spelling?

Don’t tell me truth hurts little girl, because it hurts like hell. –Underground, David Bowe That is what I have been listening to… the soundtrack to Labyrinth. How I ended up with it is a secret (no shoplifting or internet downloading) can you guess what I did?

Anyway. Look at the time! Based on the lighting I would have never guessed that it was almost 10:00 am. Lately it has been sunny, but it looks like today is cloudy and sunny. I want to walk in the park. Yawn. I am not sleepy. It is just I need new music now that Labyrinth is over. Lawrence of Arabia is just on cutting it. MIKA… needs more lyrics. There this one, The Nightmare Before Christmas, will give me two or three songs I like.

Anyway. My room is very clean now. I even packed up my winter clothes. I will have to take them home because it will be cheaper to wash them there and my Mom insisted on storing them for me. La la la la Whats this?

How is it that tea combats that weird feeling in my brain? That dull feeling. That feeling like I am still asleep. I know it has caffeine but pops (sodas) don’t do this. Oh no. I need some more songs! You might find out that it takes me time and a half to read because of medication. Plus, I have always been a slow typer.

Oh if you can find it the song Calculus Girl in the album skaflaskes by the ninjas do so. I love the lyrics, and the band has personality. Lets see if I can find it for you. Ahhh! I cannot find it!

There I got a few good snaps out of my back. Just a little yoga in the morning can really help the back. It is amazing how good yoga can make ones back feel. I didn’t realize that my back was upset, but after some yoga it became happy, and I wasn’t even doing the back relief yoga poses.

Do you know what is funny? The only thing that gets upset when I do yoga is my feet. For some reason they start to hurt. My poor feet are always upset. As I walk uphill they will start to hurt and then my legs will start to hurt and then everything goes numb.

…I’ve just looking at my bunny mug. It has a handle with a bunny on it ears popping out. On the mug is a picture of two bunny’s dressed up with hats going towards a church with no cross on it so maybe I am just imaging they are going to Easter mass. It cost me about 25 cents in a thrift store. The casher agreed that it was a keeper.

Lets see. I have to matching Halloween mugs, one Christmas one, one Easter one, and my sister (and roommate) has a valentines one. So I need the 4th of July, and Thanksgiving. (I think that New Years is too cheesy and falls under the category of Christmas.)

I used to think that when you where reading in class you where supposed to silently let people read the parentheses on their own, so when I skipped over them my English teacher got all mad at me. “YOU DON’T JUST SKIP THE PARENTHESES!” said the evil English teacher. I, however, was surprisingly unaffected and barely even looked up. You would think that a teacher blowing up over even such a small thing would upset a shy student like me.

Oh. My. Well. What?

Mountain Dew

Green liquid of energy,
You I sip,
and I love
the things you do.

It makes me forget
about sleep,
if only for a while,
a happy while

and while I cannot
have you past noon
You smile up at me,
Green liquid of energy.

Today is Ash Wednesday.
Here is sit in my gray sweater
while ice covers the ground (outside),
My fingers type on a silver lap
top, and I live in my particular mess.
A scarf, a sweatshirt, a Pepsi, a Glucerna.
Tasting the Pepsi I know it is finally flat.
I guess it has to go,
but the Dew
that must stay,
little sips, slowing the tiredness,
energy drops now from the sugary high

I edit and re-edit
pulling more and more out of my brain,
unlike the sliver fluid in Harry Potter,
which will not transfer over the internet,
you cannot see what I have seen
a door, a painting, a Leo.

And I barely remember,
those moments of my past.
A chill runs up my arms,
is it getting colder?
a half
hour more,
how many to go?

my sleep is double,
I missed my brothers birthday
due to sleep
okay, I was there for a part of it, but
I left after lunch,
because I was so tired,
and then I slept for 16 hours.
Because ‘‘ ‘‘ ‘‘ ‘‘
a little caffeine,
a little dew
would have been helpful
if only I had thought

Please God, Please
do not abandon me
why God,
why?
do I sleep away my life,
I spend my hours
like there was a tomorrow.
and when tomorrow comes,
I will be fully rested,
and alone
because I spent my friends on sleep
I spent my health on sleep
my smiles, laughs turn to tears
tears about sleep

Green liquid of energy,
You I sip,
and I love
the things you do.

you fight for me,
a valiant knight
and I forget, as the sugar rushes
to my brain
until the sugar gets too high,
because I have high blood sugar.

Glucerna
snank shake
shake well
Creamy
Chocolate Delight.
you taste so good
somehow, I like you,
along with oatmeal without sugar,
but not sugar free syrups
to go in my espresso
royale

about ten more minutes,
if only my job was to write,
whatever I wanted,
and no requirement for it to be heavy stuff.
I type slow. Really slow. Let me take a test.
Oh my! I cannot tell you the horrible results!

I had typing class in middle school, but no matter how long I tried I kept on typing the same speed. I think it is because I stop to read, and enjoy what is being written. I’ve heard many a story through typing. One about the last tree in the world being cut down, but that there is one acorn.

Lunch time!!!