Hello, Hello, Hello, hello, hello, hello

Hello,
I’m in class. Will sort of. It is free work time where we can do whatever we want, whenever we want, but this is almost the time they had originally scheduled for mandatory work time, and then they set us free. I played the Sims 2 Life Stories, and now I want to play, play, play. It was so much fun, but I don’t think they have enough stories in the life stories. How hard could they be to make? They already had the whole programming set up. All they needed to do was create. This is what happens when you take the Maxis away from an originally Maxis game, and put in foolish EA game makers.

There I did it. I talked about something other then sleep for a whole paragraph. Let me see if I can continue it for just a bit longer.

So I played the Sims, and I as I played I realized how much of a stress reliever it is to play. I’ve spent a lot of these years in college not picking up a game to play. Well, a video game. I’ve played board games with others. When I first developed Bipolar disordered I found that it took too much effort (I was depressed). It does come back to me at times though, the desire to play. I used to play on my brother’s Final Fantasy Online account, and if you want to talk about effort, it can blow you away. Somehow I miss it, getting in groups with other people (something that can be hard to do). One time I was in an amazing group. I gained a lot of experience that day.

I was a catlike creature called Namir. A Red Mage as my main job and a White Mage as my sub job. I have heard from my brother that they have Blue Mages now. I also played another online game. A popular one I don’t remember the name of. I was an Animal trainer. I would train a certain kind of animal you can ride on, and then give it for free to other people. I’ve walked around the beginner’s area of World of Warcraft (WOW… really do a google search for wow and it is at the top of the list).

Hello,
I’m about to go to class! I’m in the classroom. I think someone accused me of cutting in the bus line today, but I was the first one to move up to catch the bus, everyone was cutting me! I set here wonder if I have anything to say this afternoon. I know that I didn’t want to get up today and I woke up with a bloody nose. Yes, lucky only drops got on my bed.

Hello,
I’m out of class. Today I promised myself that if I forced myself to get up I would get something at a coffee shop. Walking in the cold I decided that I would hop in the first coffee shop I crossed by. So I’m at Starbucks with a Tall Mocha. It tastes so good. I have given up caring about high blood sugar. Its not like I’m diabetic. During class I had another blood nose, but I just held my head over the handout and watched the drips. It was quite a distraction. I accidentally told my sister there was no mid-term, but then I looked closer at the syllabus and we do have on. So we were talking about the mid-term next week during the beginning of class. I had on of those moments were nothing registered in my brain. I was listening, but I could not make out the words. I knew there were words, and they reached my ears clearly. It took a while before my mind worked up its old motor and I could understand what the Professor was saying, and when it did suddenly everything was clear and simple. Add this problem with getting the motor started in my brain to the fact that I have started to forget sentences spoken in class at a greater rate. I will even be writing the sentence, and I will be distracted by another thing the Professor said, and I will forget what I was writing.

I am quite worried about this mid-term…not really. It’s just the questions he put down, as example questions were extremely hard. What am I doing I need to be reading!

Reading done I am in my apartment before a class. What I thinking my computer needs a battery charge for my performance tonight! See ya!

Hello,
I’m in class again. Very much yawnful. I know yawnful is not a word, but it should be, and I am making it a word. I need energy. Yesterday I upset some kind of force during class by doing a humor skit with Tarot cards. The thing is I don’t know what force it was. Was it God upset with me for passing around Tarot cards? I know that my Mother is reading this so I have to explain that I believe that when a certain number of people believe in something that it takes on the energy of their belief. Was it the energy of the cards themselves that was mad at me? Or finally was it a ghost taking on the classrooms shared energy, and the energy line I pretended see. Oh yes, it could also be that someone in the class was powerfully psychic.

I’m not going into the Catholic Church’s view of fortune telling. No, not going into it.

I look a bit like a dinosaur when I stretch my back with arms locked to my sides and bending at the elbow. I have a low calorie Snapple drink made from the best stuff on Earth you know. That would be water. I have my empty Mountain Dew, which I drank over the course of over a week, and my Pepsi that has gone quite flat.

I’ve been setting here staring at the screen for a few min. now. Have can I top flat Pepsi? Even flat it is wondrous. Just look at it, and Same Dew New View, poetry, hidden on a bottle. Kiwi Pear. Oh, nature is awesome. It’s the best stuff on earth you know. Snapple in a bottle. Can’t get much better then that. Who cares about higher education? All I need in life is the best stuff on earth. Which you can buy for $1:50.

Hello,
I’m at Panara. Taking up a whole booth because I didn’t see another spot. I cannot be here forever because my computer will run out of batteries. I woke up after only 11 hours of sleep, and on a day I didn’t have classes! Are things getting better?

Hello, (This I wrote a while ago. Somehow the simple act of playing the Sims has raised my mood. I have also started to have a lot of sugar.)
This feeling inside my head makes me want to close my eyes even if I did get the right amount of sleep last night (and then some), but yesterday was quite a day. I would talk about it, but I am overheating give me a moment. (Takes off sweater) There, I am much less hot now. This shirt shows off my all to round belly. Something I thought was getting smaller, but I am not losing any weight so I guess it is my view of myself that is changing. Yet this feeling inside my head makes it seem like I could sleep, forever. I am Sleeping Beauty come Prince to wake me up. Peace. I’m going to be attacked by killer tomatoes today. Icky. This feeling. Life gives little release, and I haven’t had it in a long time. Yesterday was good. I went to bed a little early, but hopefully sleeping in will give me the energy to make it through the day. I find a certain class boring now, never a good sign. Life gives little release, and it makes someone feel as if they could sleep, and sleep all day. And I know you’ve been there too. Imagining the world outside… guess the song! And I can see that I’m not blind. I can’t be hard one you, because you know I’ve been there too. Life gives little release.

As the lecture series inches closer and closer so does my class, my humor class. God help me, it is the only one that I enjoy.

What what a beautiful Sunday morning

I must write. I feel calm, too calm. I am awake, but my brain still feels like it is sleeping. After sleeping much, as I have been in the habit of doing for a long time, I could not summon the motivation to get out of bed for over three hours. I was at peace and comfortable and the worries of the world seemed far away. I was aware that I should be working on course work, but even as I write part of me feels like it is still sleeping. This part wants to get in bed and fall back to sleep.

I feel as hopeless as ever, but I have given up on caring. The shame of my roommate knowing how much I can sleep is gone. Even courses are slowly drafting to the back of my head. Intro to the Prophet started out interesting when I was reading about the Sacred History, but now it is about how historians uncover things. I am reading the history of historians looking at the Prophet. God help me, I wanted to learn about another culture. I ask God to help me on a lot of things.

Now I am wishing that I had changed over to Essay Writing, even if the course name sounds boring. I’m tired in so many ways. I feel worn out, or as Bilbo says in the movie, The Lord of the Rings, “I feel like butter stretched over too much bread.” I remember that through the movie, even if I did read the books long ago. Sleeping so much makes it so I have to spend a greater partition of my time on college. My sister told me that my sleeping all the time makes the whole atmosphere of the apartment depressing. My other roommate is asking her what is wrong with me. I wish I knew.

What I do know is the increase in a certain calming medication to counteract decreasing an antidepressant has gone haywire. Depressed? Look at my life, look at how I sleep until my joints are sore, all those hours I am losing, and it is only getting worse. I have no fight still in me. I screamed and sang while I was manic afraid I was in hell. Now I do not care if I am in hell. I just want to cry. What am I supposed to do? So I ask God help me, but I have asked this before. Last weekend I spent two days in bed only getting up to eat. I’m not supposed to be able to sleep that long. I used to sleep eight hours, that’s average.

I took a break from writing and reading (boring reading), and now I am back. I don’t want life to be like this (ie sleeping all the time). I feel trapped and I visualize throwing myself against the bars of my cage, but I still find myself unable take the step of getting out of bed. I drift back to sleep, and my sister opens the door and asks, “Have you gotten up today.” Lets see I slept about 19 hours! It is true that unlike other medications, I wasn’t asleep the whole time, but shet betch. Yeah I said it. (Liam on youTube is fucking rad.)

I ran cross Liam on youTube because his Muffin video, but that didn’t impress me, it was only after a Zombie response was posted that I discovered Kelly. OMG betch. Just look it up on youTube, “Kelly Shoes,” if you have no idea what I am talking about. If you have no idea, then what have you been doing. I have the excuse of a disability, and college taking me out of the world of the living. I so cannot do school work right now.

Here are some jokes, and only one, I think, that anyone will find offensive. I had a longer list, but my Mom started to cry when she read it and asked me, after a long sermon, to take it down. I was supposed to find people who were compatible with me… Anyway here are the remaining jokes.

I would like to state that I am clear of mind, and heart and soul and there is no toilet paper on my shoe. In this way, I imagine I am like Jesus. Let us pray as Jesus prays, hold hands with the people next to you and I will lead you in prayer. Jesus doesn’t do house shows without $700 wine. Didn’t know where all that church money was going did you Bre? I know you heard about the whole water to wine thing, but that was before the middle ages people couldn’t tell the difference between wine and Kool-aid.

I have to confess my greatest weakness to y’all. I am addicted. I am addicted to (hand over face whisper) water. I cannot help myself. It finds its way into foods, like fruit, and the juicy part of meat. It is in drinks like tea. I’ve tried to stop, but there are drinking fountains everywhere, and three faucets in my apartment, and even if I paid to get them taken out there would still be that bathtub and toilet. Fish. Fish are also addicted to water to them it is like air to us and air is their water. Fish have no toilet paper on their shoes, and no shoes on their non-feet. I have never seen a single fish wear clothes in the shower. (would understand the shower thing more if a joke wasn’t removed) I am like a fish, and a fish is like me.

When I was younger I used to be addicted to online gaming. I was a Neo-millionaire, and I remember these long winter nights when my parents were out of town staying up to get the items from the Neo-shops while everyone was sleeping. I invested in the Neo-stock market. Yet I was sad. I did not have Neo-friends. My Neopets are now starving. I put in a fake birthday so no one could track me, because everyone wanted to track Wolfdragon17 to (street address here), and kill kill kill. Now they require the birthday to get into the account. I have been defeated by my own genius. In this way I am like a bunny rabbit, shark, panda, ferret, turkey, beluga, tiger, leopard, panther, (insert joke about Apples when you are feeling creative.)

I am embarrassed to say this, and raise you hand if you suffer the same, but I have never been attacked by Killer Tomatoes.
(Do you breathe? Can you walk?) My case in point. As for the rest.
Oh if only you had listened to the warnings broadcast across the world.

I am trapped into going to college because I need to stay on my parent’s insurance to pay for my medication, but I do not feel I am in the best condition for going to college right now. I am trapped. I am trapped into basing my life around having insurance in order to pay for medication that I do not like taking. Only I have to take it because I am told I have to and because I would become paranoid and afraid…and who knows what. This is a great joke isn’t it? I don’t hear you laughing